There are so many different things that can place stress on a child. Abuse is something that our country deals with on a daily basis. I have a first-hands experience dealing with abuse. When I was growing up, my dad was very abusive towards my mom. Mostly, it was mental abuse but it became physical a few times. The last three years before they finally got divorced was really bad. They would fight all the time and my dad was really mean to my mom. I witnessed everything. I was 13 when they finally got divorced. That was 16 years ago. The violence that I witnessed put a stress on me. I never wanted to go home from school. I was always worried when I had friends over that my dad would do something in front of them and I never told anyone what was going on. I wanted to disappear and pretend that it wasn't happening. I wanted everyone to believe my life was good and that my family was wonderful. I was affected by it though. Even today, with my husband and children, I will catch myself snapping at times without realizing it. At times when I am mad, I catch myself wanting to break something or throw things. I have to remind myself to calm down and that I do not want my children going through what I went through. It is a struggle at times. My marriage has been affected by my childhood. So many children experience that type of abuse and even worse than what I went through. As a teacher, it is my job to watch for the signs of abuse and make sure the children know that they are loved. I want them to know they can talk to me if something is going on. I never talked to my teachers and sometimes I wish that I had talked to someone. I want my students to know that it is not their fault and to get them help. Abuse affects every part of their development. I believe it is happening in every part of our country today.
Beating of children is a widely accepted and sanctioned practice in Nigeria culture. It is used as a way of instilling, discipline in a child. (CWRIN, 2001; WRM, 1998), it is therefore a usual practice in most home, and is used frequently as a mode of discipline for any offence even if it is trivial or grievous. It is very common for the children in part of the world to experience abuse. It is a way of life there.There are a few things that can be done to help prevent child abuse in Nigeria. One of the things that can be done is giving women more freedom and power. Everyone should make efforts to support family values. Everyone effort should be made to adopt or foster these children. These are just a few of the ways to help solve the problem of child abuse in Nigeria.
References
Children’s and women’s Right in Nigeria (2001). A wake up call. Situation Analysis (Eds). Anthony Hides. National Planning Commission Abuja & UNICEF Nigeria.
Women Right Monitor (1998) child labour; A new dimension to the Malaise. (Eds) Nwogu S. and Enwerem G.H. Journal of women justice Programme 1(13) 11-15.
Misty,
ReplyDeleteAs educators we have the important job as mandated reporters of abuse and neglect. This is such an important role and I always encourage my teachers to take it very seriously. Thank you for sharing your story.
Abuse can have such a devastating effect ona child as they grow. Even children who view abuse but are never abused themselves have life altering consequences form this. You are very brave to open up and share your experience. I hope you have found peace.
ReplyDeleteMisty,
ReplyDeleteOne of the worst side effects of living in a hostile environment is stress. Some the negative stress brought on by living in an unhappy household full of conflict is awful for a child's physical and mental health. Children need to be a part of a stable environment. I was touched by your story. At least now you are coping with your stress related situation and making progress towards building a solid foundation for you and your family. I too get angry and tend to fuss at my husband in front of my daughter. I try not to, but it is a behavior that I can admit I need to work on because I never want her to think she has to repeat me behavior when she is an adult. Thank you for sharing.
Misty
ReplyDeleteI know people say that it can help to talk things and in doing so it releases sress. I hope talking about your experiences help to keep you in strong and moving forward with a positive outlook. I appreciate your sharing your own personal experience. Kermethia
I am sorry to hear about your childhood experience; however, I am glad to see you are able to talk about it. Unfortunately many children have experienced some form of abuse in their home and as a result have become aggressive. It is hard to break that aggression in a child. As educators we have to be careful in our interaction with those type of children. Thank your for sharing.
ReplyDelete